We cling to memories as if they define us...
In the film adaptation of Ghost in the shell, originally a seinen manga series, the main character Major, a cyber enhanced human, struggles, understandably with her identity and specifically to remember who she is and where she came from
By the end of the film she says this great line:
“We cling to memories as if they define us, but what we do defines us.”
Often we pick an incident in our past to define us, something that happened to us that we think explains everything.
Our chosen wound.
Thing is, this wound may explain much but it cannot explain everything. Although it might have been horrible it is not helpful for you to hold onto it and keep using it to define you.
Get skin in the game, you are not a victim.